Poor boys

Sometimes I feel pity for all boys.
In a relationship they have to be in line with the expectations of their partner - who is in most cases a girl.
And I have to admit that it's very difficult to fulfill the prospects of a woman - that's the reason why I feel sympathy for those men.

When I have a partner, on the one hand I expect him to be very nice to me: he has to talk to me in a kind voice - not in this impervious voice he uses to have in conversations with all the other people. He has to listen carefully and he has to be insightful, especially when I'm sad or excited.
I want him to assure that he loves me and that he loves my body plenty times a day.
I want him to show me that it's important for him that I love him.
I want him to say romantic things in romantic places and doing romantic things.

To put it another way he has to be soft.

On the other hand  I don't wanna have a pussy cat as boyfriend - by no means!
I'm very disgusted when my boyfriend shows his weak side in the wrong time. I just want him to speak in a cute manner when I need it but at no other time. Mostly I want him to speak in a very masculine way.
I want him to show his cool side, his macho side but without being detached or frigid.
I want him to be jealous but not in the "Uh the other child took my lolly-way" but rather in the "that's my bitch you douchbag-way" .
I want him to be possessive and dominant - but also tender.
He has to seem aloof but to be close.

Perhaps I could help some boys with the text but I don't think it gets easier for men.
 I know that's very hard and unfair but I can't help myself. At least I commiserate with you.

The pleasure of presenting

Every year one can watch the same occasion the same time.
When it's the Season many people are panicking all about getting and buying presents. They are storming the malls with desperate faces, pushing and shoving in the shops surrounded by fellows in misery.

Many people find that so annoying so that they just present money - very popular around the parents of children who are older than 25.
Some people just don't know the persons well enough, they want to endow and either they do it like the older parents or they ask the person what he wants and that is what he will get.
So more and more people are coming to an understanding with their beloveds not to buy any presents, since there is no sense in exchanging the same amount of money or presenting something that the other one would have bought anyway and cost a similar amount of money as the present one gets from the other one.

In my opinion those people haven't caught the meaning of presenting.

Don't get me wrong - there's nothing wrong with presenting a gift which the other one has wished particularly. But if we are honest when someone asks us "What we desire" we can't remember one single wish at that moment (even if a lot of wishes have come to our mind during the past year) or we just don't know what to wish and so we answer something we need or we would've bought anyway.

And that is what presenting not should be like: Getting and giving gifts like money, something one would have had anyway or even nothing.

The mistake is already in the approach. Making a gift is not a matter of one day. It's a matter of a lot of days.
To find the perfect gift there's the need for listening carefully to the other person - listening to the things which are said and those which are not. Watching the other person and recording the topics which make the person's eyes light up. And by this means one gathers enough informations to be able to think about a present the other one will really like.

The best presents are those of which you didn't know that you had wanted them.

For example if someone goes swimming  three times a week and is raving about the beaches in Italy moreover a lot of his accessoires and clothes are purple the right present might be a valuable and extravagant purple bikini, if you get my meaning.

You just need to watch and listen carefully and think a little bit on your own and I promise you will find the perfect present.
Of course this is not possible with every person, but it should be with those you really like and who are really important to you .

about getting old

When I was 14 the world was my oyster. I had my first holiday without my parents, I danced in the Spanish discotheques  all night long and I thought I was going to be a designer or an artist. My parents were two people who were very unfair every now and then and I loved yet.

This year I'm going to turn 20.
And I had to come to the conclusion that I'm old - at the age of twenty -.-'
There had been indications.

Well, me whining about backache.

Me not being up to undergoing.

Me understanding my parents

Just to name some points on the long list of evidences.

But the straw to break the camels back was yesterday.
I went to the fair with my little sister. And we were on a funfair ride. Just one of those which are spinning very wildly.

I got very sick during our ride. That means my vestibulocochlear organ has leveled off in other words my girlhood is over.
When one is young he needs the rocking motion to stimulate his sense of balance. Once this process is concluded one gets sick
Now I feel old for real..

But the question is why is everybody so afraid of getting old?
Age is not only a bad thing. Just with our society being fixated on youth we often forget about the advantages like knowledge and wisdom.
Just one more evidence that we have to think out of the "society box"
Since there are many topics much more delicate and in those cases our society does the same thing as in that case.

Tarot cards, Crystal balls and astrology

Recently my gummy bears tarot was lying in my living room. I was just sitting at my desk and working on the PC when I heard a desperate cry. Shortly afterwards my boyfriend burst into the room and resentfully asked: "You do NOT believe in that, do you???" (He spoke the word "that" in a very disgusted voice), holding up my tarot. I pried the tarot cards and the tarot book out of his hands and answered fretfully: "Don't read or take it if you don't like it!"

After that incident I mulled over all those things as tarot cards, crystal balls and horoscopes.
I'm not like "Oh my horoscope says today will happen something bad, I better stay in bed all day long", if you take my meaning.

But sometimes, when I'm not sure what to do - or rather when I'm not sure what I want to do, I consult my tarot cards or my decision dice and at times also my "Unazukin-doll".

I do not blindly obey the answers of those decision aids, anyway they help me to decide. It's not so much about the answers those things give but about how those answers feel for me. Either the esoteric reply feels good for me, then I know that this decision is right or I look at the answer very unhappily, then I know I should chose the opposite way.

Polling tarot cards etc. is not so much about believing in esoteric (even if some people do) but  about getting clear about the own feelings and wishes.

Generation of thieves

I like the 80s and the 50s and the 60s. I really do.
I don't like the 70s.
But although I'm not into the 70s I think they're much better than the 90s and the years after the millennium.
I've to admit the colors of the 70s were terrible but at least the 70s had colors and I can't affirm that about the latest years.
The colors of the second millennium are snitched and so are cuts. Seems like we've ran out of ideas - not only in fashion but also in political attitudes and art.
Our generation hasn't made up a single thing itself at all. Rather we took a step aback. With us electing conservative partys and being conservative ourselves certainly it is impossible to take a step forward, to be innovative.
I don't affirm everyone of our generation is like that, but in my opinion many of us are like that. It's common practice to sit around drinking alcohol, smoking weed and to wallow in the "none taken" attitude.
We're just boring - future generations won't remember us.
But I'm not in the position to attach blame - I'm also part of this "non-movement". I'm perhaps a little bit more interested than the most of us - but not enough to take blame on you.
And so there's me taking part in being a filcher and getting angry if someone advises me of my loss of interest.
Yeah, I am ashamed but that doesn't help a change - perhaps I'm not ashamed enough, perhaps I'm much more lacy than I thoght.
But I'm trying. I'm seeking for those awkward conversations, looking for people who confront me with my goof-ups. I pretty hate this conversations I even get very angry and get loud with my conversation-partners. But after that when I'm sitting alone on the sofa  the experience works on me.
And in this moments I'm taking a tiny step forward and changes my behavior - just a little bit - but at least it changes.
And perhaps just perhaps, if enough of us do such things sometimes, we will be able to hoist the flag - not a foreign flag but our own.

How to party

Recently my neighbors living in the same house invited me to their party.
It started with orange juice and ended with the police saying to the host:"What the fuck - your apartment is looking like a slaughterhouse."

In this story occurs a frying pan, four men, three women, the police and very very much noodles - oh yeah and some blood.

Have a look at the photos made AFTER cleaning up and make up the story yourselves:

One attend that the poster on the wall is a picture of American Psycho...


No animals were harmed - except two monkeys calling themselves men.

Now I'm thinking about selling the wall on ebay as epic artwork - but that may be at odds with my neigbors.

Yella is MAD!

Update: new scriptwriter is number one on my hate-list!
I've watched the latest Supernatural season 6 and in my opinion the end of this season sucks much more than the ending of season 5 or even season 4!
I already had this bad feeling in my gut about the development of the character Cass when they showed the future visions in season 5 - you know Cass being a sex guru hippie whatever?
And now I had to notice that at the end of season 6 all my nightmares are coming true: Sir scriptwriter you have just ruined my favorite character. Shame on you!
What did you do to little Cass???? Were you drunk writing the script? Supernatural scriptwriter you're a big fat douchebag! Hope you'll fix it in season 7.
Cass: I - am - GOD!
Seriously - what the fuck????

I've just watched the trailer for "The Woman in Black"

Will watch this one too. Wish me luck - hope this is a better try.

Last time I watched a film at the flicks it was "Devil inside":
There you can watch the trailer::

http://www.devilinside-film.de/

Since I really really love Horrormovies ( my poor boyfriend doesn't like them very much and has to watch them all of the time on account of me), it's needless to say that I had to watch this movie.

Furthermore it happens to be that I'm very adducted to films that deal with the topic exorcism.

So I was cozily sitting in my cinema chair filled with expectation and the film began.

Wide-eyed I was watching the movie and the longer it took the better I found it. In spite of the rickety camera work - a stylistic device I don't really approve - the flick raised my hackles. The persons who were possessed really gave me the creeps and the blood that occurred looked very real.

The film had some really nasty scenes for example when one sees the scurf on the possessed people's faces.

So far, so good. But when I went out of the saloon I was pretty disappointed.

What could have happened in the last 5 minutes that has changed my mind so expeditiously?

Well - nothing: The film had a very pulsating scene - cut - and then - nothing. The end. In the middle of the film. No one in the hall could believe it. That should be the end? No end? I felt so unsatisfied. 

So many questions left - neither it was a good end, nor it was a bad end. So both - the fans of happy endings and the fans of sinister endings - were just gutted.

Conclusion:

A film with high potential which leaves you unslaked in front of the screen.

I'm pretty sure lots of people hate the scriptwriter of  "Devil inside". Perhaps he just got possessed and couldn't end his script - in this case: Sorry Mr.Scriptwriter - sorry for all my bad whishes to you. In any other case: Screw you!

Just found out that my mum has a "plush-microphone-thing". Told me that she has always been wanting to bite in one. I'm afraid perhaps it runs in the family.

Today I had an epiphany: Now I know how these plush microphones are made!

You know just those they're using on the newscast when they're outside and there is much wind.

And it happened like this:

My cat (it is a Norwegian forest Cat) dropped my headset and rubbed her head on it.

So when I woke up in the morning and picked it up, it looked just like this:

Hence I know that my little cat Coco is secretly working for the microphone industry - I'm still shocked.

Perhaps I'll send a letter to the Secretary of State for Employment and ask him for advocating against cat labour.